So, there’s a lady on TikTok having a bad time right now because she shared her "My husband cheated on me with my friend" story. She expected people to be on her side and feed her a bunch of sympathy, but as the details were shared… she comes across as a shitty person. And her husband should be in prison.
I’m not saying that all youth pastors are sexual predators, but it is a job that is very attractive to sexual predators. (Same with school teachers, priests, school janitorial staff, babysitters, nursing, doctors, etc.)
It puts them in a position of authority over people in the age range that most excites them, and they are able to use that authority to pick through the kids in their power to find the ones most vulnerable to abuse. And then they abuse them. It’s disgusting. And criminal.
And the lady doesn’t seem to understand that no, it wasn’t "her friend cheating with her husband," it was her husband grooming a teenager and abusing that teenager for years into adulthood.
And she herself was a tool he used to help facilitate the grooming.
She was "the wife," who would be there to show that "No, he’s not getting you alone to manipulate you or anything. His wife is here. He would never do anything inappropriate with his wife here. It’s okay for him to massage your shoulders or have what might possibly be deemed inappropriate conversations with you. His wife is here." And she would invite the girl over to bake cookies or pack snack bags for youth group camping trips or hanging out during COVID…
That there was never a criminal court case, but that the church paid the girl a settlement fee and he was fired from his job and was required to sign an NDA… Dude was guilty af.
He should not be a youth pastor, and it is good that he was fired. Hopefully he’s not able to find another job that brings him into close contact with vulnerable people.
He is a sexual predator.
And that she likens his grooming of a child with alcohol addiction? Fuck no.
Being a sexual predator is not an addiction. It is not something that can in any way or form be excused.
It’s a reason to seek psychiatric counseling and therapy and all that good stuff, but it is not something someone is chemically drawn to do. You have not committed so much sexual assault that your body now needs it to live.
Sexual assault is something he wants to do.
It’s probably the reason he chose to be a youth pastor. So that he could be up close with the youth.
His job allowed him to hunt his chosen prey. And if he had in any way been a good person? He would not have become a youth pastor. He would have chosen a profession and lifestyle that did not bring him into contact with young people.
He’s a very gross dude. And the only reason he would feel regret about it? Is because he got caught.
He faced some consequences and lost his job. And now his wife (or ex-wife now) is taking to social media to complain that "My friend cheated with my husband." And she doesn’t accept that her "friend" is actually a victim of her husband. And that she was one of the tools he kept handy in his grooming toolbox.
She may have once been one of his victims–her timeline of them getting together when she was 15 and marrying 10 years later has me wondering how old he was when she was 15–but at this point she is simply his apologist. She needs divorce and therapy and hopefully they don’t have any kids together because yeesh.
Anyways, everyone on TikTok is giving her the business, and she’s desperately trying to defend herself and that her (ex?) husband isn’t a groomer and an abuser. It’s just that her "friend" cheated with her husband and is a terrible person for doing it.
Hm.
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