rambling

Have you ever felt like contacting someone on a particular fanfic archive and just being like "Look, dude, I really REALLY love your fic. So I’m going to have to edit this whole thing for you because it’s driving me insane when I download copies to my ereader and there’s missing words or ‘Saitama’ is ‘Saitaman’ or Amai Mask/Sweet Mask is a different name and there’s a ‘Dr. Stench’ instead of ‘Dr. Kuseno.’ For reals, you’re killing me, bro."? Would that be rude?

Give me my f’ing Egg and Toaster fics the way I like ’em: sunnyside up lol

So yeah. I’ve become a One-Punch Man fanfic fan. There’s not a massive amount of great fics, but there’s a better ratio of good/great fics to bad than there ever was in the Criminal Minds fandom.

I kinda feel like writing some Toaster and Egg fics, but I honestly don’t usually write in the fandoms I read.

Is that weird? I feel like that’s weird.

I mean, I CONSUME Tony Stark fics at a rate you would not believe. Yet I’ve never written an Avengers fic.

I read the main fandoms, but I write odd little one-offs in tiny fandoms I can’t even name because boom, there I’ll be. Exposed. Like a jellyfish left out by the tide, slinking back into the ocean when the water rises, but at risk of being poked by a passing stick until that cover comes back.

Seriously, I still remember when I was featured in a Cracked article as a young fanficcer. That shit was traumatic.

In the comments of my LJ, people were like "I love your response. You’re amazing" about my faux-casual "I don’t really give a fuck that I was featured. I wrote FICTION about an aged up cartoon character meeting an adult live-action character in a crossover that could never happen. It’s all fake and nobody gets hurt. It’s not like I’m out attacking people or something" nonsense.

I was dying inside. For real, reals.

Traumatic.

Like, the fact that I can still think of that moment now, with my inbox exploding with messages from Cracker-heads drawn to it by the direct linking of a popular website. So many comments–and none of them really all that bad–but not having any idea what was happening until a commenter told me I was the number one in a featured article.

Social media was kinder back then, as there weren’t as many people, so the ratio of assholes to normal people was much lower.

"Don’t feed the trolls" was just beginning to be a thing wise old heads would tell us n00bs.

So my casual response and "don’t be an idiot" brush off worked a lot better than the number two’s freak out and what all. Like, I could have done the nuclear option like most of the people on the hit-list, but I just gave them all the proverbial finger and was like "Enjoy my two year old WIP, you angry-ass bitches" before continuing on continuing on.

The only commenter I felt bad for was the one that was like "I came here to give you shit, but now that I’ve read the fic… It’s the kind of thing I would have really loved to read when you were writing it. Shame it’s not completed. You are a legend." Like, they came to hate, gave me love, and was the first (and only) person to ACTUALLY use the word legend about me in a sentence.

Ever since those days I’ve been a bit gun-shy about taking credit for my own work.

I like when people like my stories. I enjoy the comments. The kudos. I feel bad for those begging for more on stories that haven’t been written on since the 00s.

But I don’t respond because I’m broken.

I handle things well in the moment, but I internalize every bit of hate and derision. And that Cracked article? Wowowowowow.

I never knew I was such a freak until it got pointed out to me. Like, there was a sense on the author’s part that it was okay to punch down on me because I wrote fanfic, and that fanfic was in a niche fandom crossed with a more popular yet still super nerdy fandom, so I was trash.

Which is a roundabout, metaphor-heavy explanation for why I think I like One-Punch Man. I mean, I haven’t seen all the episodes–though Hulu kept playing them even after I fell asleep so I think I’m in season 1 but I could be somewhere in season 3–but I really enjoy the fanfic. Because Genos being sweet on Saitama makes me happy, and Saitama getting the acknowledgement he deserves always lightens my mood.

Being able to one-punch any situation would be awesome. But having the ability to not care about the words of strangers would be superpower enough.

Anyways, please excuse my rambling. This Toaster and Egg fic has gotten me frustrated.

Like, dudes, for serious: Every chapter doesn’t need an author note detailing your what-the-ever. And if you include notes with every update, you can always go back and delete them if they have nothing to do with the story.

I mean, it’s great to know about your thought processes or what you had for breakfast when you were writing, but when I download the mobi months or years after it’s completed… those author notes become really annoying. It’s like a splash of water between chapters, totally taking me out of things.

Also, a big bunch of asterisks may feel like a great way to break up story sections… but text-to-speech reads out every single one as "asterisk." So when you create two or three or five or a HUNDRED lines of just asterisks… I want to gouge out my ears. Please stop that shit now. I mean, I love you, but NO.

Anyways, Imma feed some birds, finish this Toaster and Egg fic, then I’ll write some non-fandom stuff of my own. (Faizel 03 anyone? Paradigm Slip maybe?)

~Pax
HarperWCK