Okay, so sometimes my brother can be a dick. I laugh about it, but he’s always getting me with stupid stuff.

We were watching like Animal Planet or something and it was all stories about amazing animals and their feats. So during the commercial, The Girl blurts out “Penguins can fly!”

I scoffed like really loudly, “No they can’t. Whoever told you that is stupid because penguins can’t fly.” I probably sounded a little too irritated, but she’s always coming out with stupid shit to try and get as much attention as possible. She’s still trying to fit into our family because she only came to live with all of us during the summer, and now we’re staying at my Dad’s house. Three strong willed adults leaves a couple of kids that don’t really get away with a whole lot, especially the lies she likes to tell. (The most worrisome thing for me is that she actually seems to believe her lies, even the really crazy ones.)

Anyways, that whole penguins flying thing had me just snapping out as fast as possible to tell her that it wasn’t real. She kept insisting it was true, and we got into this whole deal, going rounds and rounds.

Then my brother goes, “Check this out” and turns his computer.

On the screen was like a National Geographic type show with penguins flying around. “The only penguins that are able to fly and who love to migrate to like the Bahamas.”

For a minute, my brain just stalled and I was like “It’s impossible, but it might be true.” And I was really kind of getting into the idea of it, when there was a snap and I was like “No way. I call Shenanigans! It’s like that spiders smoking weed video. FAKE!”

And my brother laughed and turned his computer to the spider video.

It was good to laugh like that, and thinking about it now, I’m still laughing.

That’s the kind of thing I get nostalgic for afterwards.

BTW, my brother just said that Hank Hill got raped by a dolphin. Seems legit.

Heroes & Villains at Amazon

I thought I would revisit my sci-fi epic. I work on these stories every once and awhile; hardcore space opera, baby, the only opera I enjoy.

They’re badly in need of editing and I need some smart sci-fi brain to go over them because I’m not sure what’s possible or not and my way of writing has changed since I started the series. Still, they’ve always been my favorites 🙂

Title: Sapphire
genre: sci-fi
series: Facet of Empire

Summary: Sapphire is brought to the prison planet Hades to find the notorious muderer William Hedell.

Excerpt of “Sapphire”

An Elderly Lady is Up to No Good at Amazon

There have been times when stories appear in my brain fully formed and all I have to do is write them down. That’s how “Laughing Curse” has struck me; I dreamt the story last night and now it’s bouncing around in my brain.

The only thing I wish is that I hadn’t been woken up and I’d been able to see the whole thing. That would have made me so happy.

It shouldn’t be too long before I let you all meet Santiago and Edgar, man adventurers, or something.

An Elderly Lady is Up to No Good at Amazon

I don’t even know what I was thinking when I started this 🙁

The first time he saw her, Jimi knew that she was the One. The Neo to his Trinity.

She was all lean muscle and leather, her body sleek and smooth as dolphin skin. She looked like a hard woman, and the idea of it had him squirming.

She was everything he’d been dreaming of.

“All right, let’s go,” he said, striding forward. At the same time he accessed his data node and sent a quick message: I accept. Your money is being transferred as we speak. Half now and half when I leave.

So yeah. There’s a reason why I like to write full notes when I come up with a story idea. That way when I’m flipping through my notebook later I can figure out what the heck I was thinking, especially if I was inebriated at the time.

This might possibly be an S&M piece, or some kind of true love story, or I don’t even know 🙁

Bad me! No biscuit.