TV show

I realize that quite a few people don’t like "Avenue 5," which likely contributed to its cancellation. And perhaps their animosity was well-earned, as the jokes sometimes fall flat and most of the characters are unlikeable assholes. It is, after all, the story of a bunch of ludicrously rich people aboard a ridiculously luxurious space cruise liner flailing their way toward their own doom.

For reals: Their space cruise liner gets knocked off course, lengthening their voyage from 8-weeks to 3 years, and in their determination to right their course and get home earlier… They end up lengthening their journey to 8+ YEARS after nearly flying themselves straight into the sun.

A ship filled with the kind of people that most would barely feel an iota of empathy for and having them entirely comprise the cast of characters… of course viewers weren’t enthralled with the concept. And it’s not as though there weren’t other people aboard the ship that people might have had more of a connection with. There’s a full staff of maids, cooks, janitors, and entertainment staff that we never see.

One of the first episodes features a woman complaining that the maid that cleans her room folded her towel into an anus rather than the pleasant shape she expected. The comedian hired to entertain the ship has difficulty dealing with telling jokes while staring out a window at DEAD BODIES regularly passing by his view.

Yet we barely see any of the staff aboard the ship. They have to be there, as food is still being cooked and served. Rooms are still being cleaned and shipboard life is still running smoothly enough that the rich people have to be told that they’re in a dangerous situation. But we never see them or where they live.

There was a time in my life where I considered applying to be a crewmember aboard a cruise ship. The idea of being able to use the facilities aboard ship during my off hours and when they weren’t in use appealed to me. Being able to leave the ship and enjoy all the vacation spots while the ship was docked and I was off duty seemed like a great opportunity for someone that otherwise can’t afford to travel. The only thing that stopped me was looking up life aboard ship for crewmembers and seeing that there were a lot of stories of sexual abuse and some ships taking away peoples’ passports and basically treating them as slaves once they’re in international waters and unable to leave the ship.

All the pros made the corporate admitted cons seem bearable. Sharing a tiny cabin with multiple people and only having a narrow sleep berth and a small locker for my own didn’t seem that bad if I would be spending the rest of my time working, entertaining myself, or off the ship when it was docked. Being able to see other countries and enjoy an echo of the luxuries that paying customers did was enough to make me seriously consider replying to the job listing.

So with my knowledge of crew life aboard modern cruise ships–steps removed as it is–I was disappointed that the episodes of "Avenue 5" didn’t feature any of the real crewmembers as main characters.

We see the engineers, we see the comedian, we see the Captain and bridge crew that are actually actors, and we see the "humorously depressed" head of customer relations Matt. But we don’t get any stories featuring actual crew members. The people that are actually keeping life aboard ship running smoothly.

We see the most luxurious cabins aboard the space cruise ship, and we see the large economy cabins aboard the cruise ships… but we never see where the actual crewmembers live and work. We never see the behind-the-scenes life and work of the people that are now being forced to serve the demanding and unpleasant rich people for an EXTRA 8 YEARS.

They signed on to work for 8-weeks–2 MONTHS–and now they’re trapped for 8 YEARS. And we never see them.

I don’t know if the creators and writers of "Avenue 5" simply thought that telling the stories of the crew would be too depressing or if they never thought they would have stories at all… But it really makes you think and wonder about the kinds of people making the show.

Are they so wealthy and out-of-touch that the idea of the crew were complete non-entities? Like, they so lacked the depth of imagination that they focused on the passengers and main crew because those were the kinds of people they could empathize with and they simply couldn’t picture the trials and tribulations the "poor" crew were facing?

Are the crewmembers living in the same conditions as modern cruise ship crew live? Are they spending the next 8-years living in barely habital conditions while being screamed at by asshole passengers? The fake bridge crew obviously have normal-sized cabins, but is that because they regularly interact with the passengers and there’s a chance a passenger might see their living conditions? Or does the entire crew have normal-sized cabins?

The fact that we never see the crew using the amenities aboard ship makes me wonder if they’re forced to live in squalor in the depths of the ship. Are they all crammed in there like sardines while the passengers fall into despair over being trapped in the "tiny accommodations" of their luxurious cabins while enjoying the rest of the massive ship?

Is the crew being paid hourly wages for the entire length of the voyage no matter how long it is? Or are they under contract to receive a lump sum? Are they receiving the same food as the passengers or are they under short rations due to the lengthened journey?

The passengers are seen as being important because they’re still going to be rich when the Avenue 5 finally returns to Earth. As such, Judd and his board of investors see them as being more important than the crew. It’s why Judd hosts a revolving number of passengers in his cabin to try and sooth their disatisfaction and anger over being stuck on the ship.

When the various mistakes they make in attempting to shorten the journey results in further catastrophes, all that matters on the show is how unhappy the privileged people are. Maybe if there were some stories of the crew and their plight, viewers would have had more empathy for everyone. As it was, the whole show is unsympathetic people doing unsympathetic things with the viewer not feeling a sense that anything would be lost if everyone aboard died horrifically.

"And nothing of value was lost" would be the likeliest response if the Avenue 5 flew directly into the sun and burnt up. Which is sad, because there had been such potential in the premise of "Avenue 5."

It’s too bad we won’t ever see if the Avenue 5 makes it back to Earth. Or if everyone will starve or run out of oxygen or be eaten by the cannibal they foolishly allowed on board.

It is a story without an end. We will never know what happens to the crew and passengers aboard the Avenue 5. Their journey home unending and unresolved.

~Harper Kingsley

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